Saturday, July 19, 2008

Blahg Revolution!

Three cheers for BlahgHer! Thank you V-Grrrl for your inspiration on so many levels.
I am inspired! It's been just one week since I was released from the hospital for my Ovarian Cancer surgery and I decided that my recovery would be a time of growth and not one of self-pity, or being a whiny ass about being hit with this disease. I am convinced that this cancer was the result of a much stress-filled life. I know I am the only one who can rid myself of the demands of this stress that seems to follow me in whatever I am doing. It must stop. How can I use my time away from work (and housework) as a learning and growing experience? I decided I would dive in to as many of my art hobbies as possible. Bring them out of the closet so to speak. Stop stressing and start creating.

With that said, I am so excited about having time to work on stuff I have started and stuffed into closets or under the bed and really try and develop my talents! I'm not going to worry about how good they are, just that it brings me great joy in the creating. It gives me the opportunity to try and capture a small glimpse of Brenda on the inside and throw it out there for all to see, good or bad. I know I would rather improve on my limited abilities in a variety of areas, instead of trying to be an expert in one given area. So, for now, I will bounce around to what the day moves me to do, whether it be the challenge of working with watercolors, the joy of blending acrylics, the capturing of a moment in time in photography, or just the satisfaction of accomplishment I get from beading or crocheting.

Not mastering any of these arts used to leave me with a great sense of inadequacy. After reading V-grrrl and tracking down the book "Journal Revolution" which really encourages one to just do it, whatever "it" is and enjoy the expression of one's self, has given me a new courage to start anew.

I'm so jazzed about this wonderful book: "Journal Revolution: Rise Up & Create! Art Journals, Personal Manifestos and Other Artistic Insurrections" by Linda Woods and Karen Dinino. It encourages you to create your art no matter the media, let it come from within to be an expression of who you are and what you are feeling. It was so liberating! I truly paint for myself enjoyment so who cares that it isn't perfect?

I realize I need to stop being the critic. The learning is in the mistakes and I need to learn to appreciate the mistakes for what they are. Many times it's the accidents that are the best part of a piece. Yet, being a perfectionist is the character trait (flaw) that is my greatest barrier in developing my art. Much of my work shown here is unfinished, pieces started and left for another day, many needing the highlights and shadows to complete but me feeling hesitant on where to start. Well, now the time has come to just do it! Yea! I am free to just be me!


V-Grrrl said...

Beautiful! I love the happy vibe in these scenes and the rich colors. Sunflowers are my favorite flowers, and your composition with its clear blues and deep shadowed reds is just the way to set them off.

I've been in the doldrums lately and so knowing that I inspired someone else is encouraging. I think letting go of perfectionism and all our preconceived ideas about what's worth doing can help us release a lot of stress and cull our lives of all the energy-drains that bring us down.

And I also think when we are at the bottom of the well, admitting it and throwing a virtual party like BlahgHer is more than a little therapeutic. I had a blast imagining all y'all hangin out with me.

I'm looking forward to seeing more of your work!

amateur-in-art said...

Thank you! Know that in the midst of your difficulties you are bringing inspiration to others! I too am heading to some somewhat-scary medical stuff (but very small scale compared to your own situation) - and I believe that my new-found and sudden excessive obsession with art/collage/etc. is probably related to something like a way for me to cope, express (or ignore) my fears and etc. in a way that does not involve conscious thought. I'm more of a writer than a visual artist, so this sudden obsession is very unusual for me, but it is definitely there.

I love what you say here in this post about imperfection. My friends told me once upon a time that I needed to "embrace my imperfection" and now I think my playing with art is a way for that to come powerfully home.
P.S. I think it's working!